Thursday, July 23, 2015

Self Love

If you look up "self love" online, the first definition that will pop up, is that it is "regard for one's own well-being and happiness".
Funny that, because when we think of self love, we generally jump to the negative - things like narcissism and vanity.
We have been told so many time to not think too much of ourselves, that we should be grateful for all we have and never look too long in the mirror. This message is so ingrained in us that we sometimes struggle with genuine compliments and down-weigh our achievements.
I was once told by a professional coach to say affirmations like "I am a success" each morning and honestly, I couldn't. It made me cringe all alone, in front of my bathroom mirror.

So how did we get here?
I honestly don't know but I think it has a lot to do with this race we are on - racing to that top position, racing to that dress size, racing - always racing. If you are racing, you cannot be looking at your feet, you look next to you and behind you at the other racers. Its a competition!
As so, we behave this way with our lives.
We hardly stop these days to give ourselves a pat on the back for all the hard grind we put in. There no gold stars for effort as we grow up. We feel that it is all or nothing. Question however, is who decides?

by Akua Naru, Mo(u)rning  (seen on Instagram - thegoodquote)

I am a BIG supporter of personal excellence. I truly think that if you have a talent or skill you enjoy, you should train it and try perfect it. You should be the best you can be.
But here is were I swim against the current - I said be the best YOU can be, not be the best according to someone's standards.
The problem is that so many of us are racing and perfecting and training and toiling but we don't know if we have "made it" because we are using someone's judgement instead of our own.

We need to take a step back now and again and review why we are doing what we are doing.
And even if nobody pats you on your back, celebrate our own achievements.
If you have bought a car, celebrate it even if people tell you its not a German car.
If you have lost a kilogram, celebrate because you know what it strength required that loss.
If you are dedicated and working hard behind that computer, 5 days a week, celebrate because you worked very hard to get that job.

Our stories are different. Our journeys too. But we all have dreams and goals and nobody should determine if they are significant but you. And nobody should say if you have reached them, but you.
2 Timothy 1: 7 states that God has not given us the spirit of fear. But the spirit of power and of love, and of a sound mind.
Walk in the world with what God had graciously given you!
Walk in your truth and thank God always for all He has gifted you with.

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